The MeSSenger: Today's featured Blogger

Today's  blog post is by my fellow blogger, The MeSSenger.

We were having a discussion, as we always do, a few days ago about different topics. The next day, I received an email from him with this article he had written. He simply wanted to share his thoughts with me on various topics we had discussed, and I want to share them with you.

Here is what he had to say...

What is happiness?

“Smile”

Many people associate happiness with a smile. A smile is birthed when facial expression is characterized by an upward curving of the corners of the mouth and indicating pleasure, amusement, or derision. However, this scintillating facial expression, pleasure and/or amusement do not always convey happiness; it could very well represent the complete opposite, depending on the situation. So then, if a smile doesn’t indicate happiness, what does? Some may argue my logic and that is perfectly find as we are all entitled to our beliefs, but for me, happiness is something that cannot be seen rather experienced, hence the saying “never judge a book by its cover”. Often times, we are guilty of assuming what is true opposed to researching or investigating to discover the facts, or what is factual; this is why so many of us are confused. Over the years we have learned to accept, very easily, the unknown! 

“Love”

The profoundly tender, passionate, and warm feeling of affection toward another person; or the common word “Love” is another thing that determines happiness for a lot of people. Although I believe that the association has a strong influence, I find it a bit vague to define happiness with love. My reason for saying this is simple. Ever witnessed or experienced being loved by multiple people, and still have the feeling of unhappiness? Many celebrities have spoken, and speak about this, often. I have heard one of them say and I quote, “It’s great to have the love of my loyal fans who look up to me as their role model, but sometimes I feel like I’m going to fail them because I am not happy; and I haven’t been for a while now”. Although the emotion love has proven to influence some great attributes in people, in my opinion, it should never be a definitive reason as to why a person is or should/shouldn’t be happy.  

“Relationship”

Do you know a person, be it a friend or family member, who just can’t cope with being alone? They feel as though they always have to be in commitment with another person in order to feel appreciated, and have happiness. I know a lot of people who depict being single as being cursed; they allow their relationship status to overcome them, leaving them with a feeling of hopelessness. I find it a bit disheartening for an individual to place the extent of their value into another persons’ hand. Oddly enough, people do it all the time, and have been doing it for centuries. I sincerely believe that we all should be co-dependent on one another; meaning, we all should help each other. However, I believe not feeling happy as an individual, existing alone, makes it difficult to be happy in a partnership existing with another person. 

“Money”

All of us have heard it mentioned at some point that money doesn’t buy happiness and that may very well be the case, but if given an opportunity, many of us would at least try! Financial security has been a proven factor to relieve stress. The comfort of being able to pay your bills alone is self-rewarding. Money stimulates that feeling of accomplishment, but does it define happiness? We can go on an endless debate about this and never reach a verdict. Why? Because for those people who have been in poverty for years, money can very well feel like their saving grace, but to those who aren’t strangers to wealth, money doesn’t move them. Ultimately, I believe that it is our opinion that money has some sort of healing power to transform our emotions, but the truth remains “money is just money”. It has no ulterior motive because it isn’t a living thing! What we choose to do with money is a whole new topic of discussion for another day! 

“Power/Fame”

Some people are happy because of status. They get off by making themselves superior above others because they are placed in a position of power. They happily go about their day being worshiped and praised as if they, themselves, are God! To be frank, I believe that many of these superficial earthly gods are happy to be idealized, but the question remains, “Are they happy?”  They may sit on a pedestal and dictate to others with their demands and requests, but does this make them truly happy? I can’t speak for others, but for me, always having to tell others what to do and how to do it, doesn’t make me feel happy rather exhausted. It makes me feel like my only value is to dictate and control people, things, and/or situations, which leaves me little time to enjoy my life. The greatest thing about having power and fame is the pursuit of gaining it, but once you have it, then what? Is it used to make you happy? Is it shared with the one who makes you happy? If so, why aren’t you happy without them? Since questions like this come with the definitive question, “Does power and fame make one happy?”…I would go on to say that the answer would be “no”.  

As we can see, happiness is not determined by a particular thing. It is influenced by many factors both positive and negative, even spiritual encounters in some instances. Whether happiness comes from another person, an emotion, a connection, and/or position of status and power, there is one important thing that determines its’ existence and that element is “you”. Ultimately, without you making a conscious decision to be happy, happiness will never exist in your life. Another person can’t be happy for you, nor can they bring happiness to you. They can influence the feeling, but you have to choose to feel it for yourself. Having money, power, and fame does not automatically put you in a state of happiness. Again, happiness is a choice! So then, if happiness is a choice, how do we choose to be happy? It is simple, we try it the other way first! Instead of being happy for a day, try being angry throughout your day and then analyze things to see which way is better. I can’t speak for anyone else but, when I’m angry I tend to be moody, I suffer socially because no one wants to be around me, and physically my blood pressure usually goes up. I get anxious, my appearance becomes intimidating, and my spirit comes across as ungodly. In addition, I’m usually sweaty with a feeling of exhaustion because of the amount of energy my body uses to stress and be angry. Overall, I do not feel very well.  

On the other end, when I make the choice to be happy, I feel my best and I look my best. People around me tend to be happier as well. I’m a much easier person to deal with because of my demeanor and my spirit. Happiness makes me feel free. It inspires me and gives me vision to see that situations for me could be worse. Happiness humbles me and makes me appreciate myself more. When I’m truly happy, I do not need validation from anyone or thing. I can exist in the world and not be of the world. I do not need a partner to determine my happiness. I don’t need love or acceptance from another person. I don’t have to be the most powerful or the most influential, nor do I feel the need to have more money than the next man or woman. When I’m truly happy, I don’t have to smile to show others my spirit. I simply wake up, appreciate who God created me to be while treating others respectably, and I go about me day feeling like I am on top of the world! Why? Because I found within me that place that only I know how to discover; it’s the place that I call “happiness”! And this joy that I have finally found, the world didn’t give it to me nor can the world take it away. 

Written By:

 The MeSSenger

I agree that in order to have happiness in life, we first have to be happy with ourselves. Sure people, places, and things can evoke the emotion, but it's only temporary when we allow those same people, places, and things, to define us.  We become sad being alone. Why? Because we don’t know who we are!

I challenge each of you, if you don't already do this, to take some time out of your day to make time for yourself. Get to know who you are so that you will be able to let others know, so you will be able to love yourself better, so that you are not placed inside of their little box. It's okay to spend time with yourself. Who wants to spend time with you if you don't like spending time with yourself? No one! 

Take a good, long, hard look in the mirror, and examine your image. Figure out the features you love on your face, on your body. What are your best assets? Not only does doing this help us to feel better about ourselves, it helps boost our confidence and self-esteem. When you know you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good people notice. You become a better YOU! You define your happiness! 

A special thanks to The MeSSenger for being our guest today, and sharing his insight with us. We hope he will join us again. In the meantime, checkout his blog: www.soulbrother-whenlifespeaks.blogspot.com for more of his work.

Until next time, be inspired, be encouraged, & be you!

Purple Hugs,

KeKe Chanel

Have you ever felt stuck???

Feeling Stuck

Have you ever felt like everything is moving fast around you while you are moving in slow motion? Chin up! You are not alone. This happens to the best of us during times we need to take a step back and see what is truly going on around us. I believe it’s a way to reflect on our progress, our passion, and our purpose. We sometimes get thrown off track by taking on too many projects at once. We can allow people, places, and things to distract us from our vision. Don’t be discouraged! Using something meant to be negative for something positive will come out of this setback. We all need recharging every once in a while.

I am not too proud to share with you that lately, I have been suffering from extreme anxiety. My mind is constantly going. I feel like I’m standing in quicksand. There are so many thoughts running through my head. I cannot sleep, think straight, or focus on any one thing for longer than five minutes. Am I going to allow this anxiousness to overtake my life? Will I lose control and burnout? No! God didn’t bless me with all the things that I have to just give up. Instead of having a breakdown I dust my shoulders off, take a step back and reflect on the things around me, and see the positive in every area of my life. I smile at my children. I laugh with my husband. I work on projects I haven’t worked on in months with fresh eyes. I pray and allow God to guide my steps.

Think about it. If life was as simple as we want it to be, we wouldn’t appreciate the small things that make us who we are. We wouldn’t pray or have faith. We wouldn’t value our future, or teach our children to work hard for the things they want in life. There would be more depression and chaos in the world than it already is; which would ultimately lead us to an untimely death caused by a silent assassin called stress. We would become stagnant, complacent. Our wants, needs, desires, and expectations would become null and void. We would simply walk through life with tunnel vision. I don’t know about you, but I refuse to live so dearth.

I’m here to tell you that it’s time to dust yourself off, take a deep breath, and press on. You are relevant. You are blessed even in times of darkness. You are right where you should be, but it’s unquestionably not the position you are destined to be. If we don’t take time out to reflect, we become self-absorbed. We become overly confident. We become boastful. Words search as: humble, appreciative, and gracious become lost to us. We forget that God exists and gives us life!

Feeling stuck isn’t a ruthless thing. I believe it’s a necessary thing in order to progress. Let’s face it, if we didn’t feel stuck from time to time we would work ourselves crazy. We wouldn’t take time out to enjoy life. We would become beat, bitter, and broken. We would forget to smile, to laugh, to live.

Once you get back on track, and you will! Stop thinking you are not worthy of the things you have accomplished and more. Stop thinking you are not enough. Stop making excuses for where you are now, and start thinking about where you want to be. Stop second-guessing, or overthinking your gifts. God created them in you. That should give you a reason to fight the funk. You are worthy! You are enough! You are great! Remember that life happens. Not every day will be fairies and unicorns. There will definitely be trolls and dragons. At the end of the day, if you don’t think more of yourself, your brand, your company, or whatever it may be, no one else will.

Sometimes we have to encourage ourselves. It’s okay to be our own cheerleader, but having a great support system is abundant. Surround yourself with individuals who are like-minded, who want to better themselves and their future. Connect with people who will motivate and inspire you. Not everyone who started out with you will finish with you. Not that you are ungrateful to them and how they affected you in some way, it’s just time to move forward. Putting yourself first isn’t a crime it’s called cultivating! Pruning out weeds is essential to any garden that expects a full harvest, after the seeds are planted. The key is planting the seeds!

So, the next time you are feeling stuck think about having a car. We take care of the car because it gets us to where we want and need to go. If we don’t maintain it, it will breakdown. Our gas needle warns us that we are in need of gas by what? A light comes on! The car doesn’t move as fast as it has the potential to do so. I say this to say sometimes our fuel will run low. It’s up to us to fill ourselves up again in order to reach our final destination. Don’t allow taking a time of reflection to cause you to become empty. Relax…breathe…and accelerate to the next phase of your life. It’s already waiting for you to arrive. In other words, SHUT UP AND DRIVE!!!!

Until next time, Be Encouraged, Be Inspired, & Be You!!!

Purple Hugs,

KeKe Chanel

Author Elle Wright

New Book Release The Forbidden Man: 
An Edge of Scandal Series Book #1

                               

Today I am spotlighting Author Elle Wright. Her new release The Forbidden Man is now available for purchase at any book retailer. Go grab your copy now! I have mine...

I received a copy of The Forbidden Man last week for promotional purposes. I started reading and could not put it down. I finished the book in a day and a half. Yeah, it is that good!! Elle Wright delivers pure romance, great characters, and an amazing storyline, leaving her readers entranced and wanting more. Just a little inside scoop: Book #2 in the Edge of Scandal Series releases in November. You can preorder your copy on amazon.com today. I already did! 

THE FORBIDDEN MAN by Elle Wright (July 28, 2015; Forever Mass Market; The Edge of Scandal #1)

Sydney Williams has forgiven her fiancé, Den, more times than she can count. But his latest betrayal just days before their wedding, is too big to ignore. Shocking her friends and family, she calls off the engagement. She walks out on Den...and into the arms of his brother, Morgan.

Known as a player, Morgan Smith has secretly spent years fighting his feelings for Sydney. When Den's latest dirty deed leaves Sydney devastated, Morgan can't stop himself from coming to her rescue. What begins as friendship quickly escalates into all-consuming passion. Despite their intense connection, Sydney would rather deny her desire than come between brothers. But as Morgan is determined to make Sydney his, Den won't give her up without a fight...

Buy the book!

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BAM

Here is an excerpt:

“Are you still feeling cold?” he asked, adjusting the heater and finishing off the contents of his flask.

“Actually, I’m feeling pretty hot.” She jumped when he started coughing. “Are you okay?”

He wiped his mouth. “I’m straight.”

“You sure?” Syd studied his face as she smoothed her hand over his back.

“Yeah.” He closed the flask and tucked it back into his pocket. “It’s the liquor.”

“Huh?”

“The bourbon.” He patted his pocket. “It’s making you hot.”

“Somehow I doubt that,” she mumbled.

“What?” he asked, leaning in closer.

I doubt it’s the liquor. “Forget it. I’m cold again.” She burrowed into him.

“You want me to make you hot?” he asked.

Her eyes flashed to his and her lips parted.

“I meant . . .” He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat.

“Uh, I can turn the heat up.”

“No.” She forced a smile and lowered her gaze. “It’s fine.”

When his hand caressed her cheek, her eyes closed of their own volition. Time seemed to stand still. She felt his warm breath on her skin above her lips. “I think—”

She dug her nails into his knee. “Maybe you should call Kent again. See where he is.”

He slid his thumb down the side of her neck.

She exhaled. So this is what Terry McMillan meant when she waited to exhale?  “Because this isn’t going anywhere good. You’re acting like you want to kiss me and I know that’s not true,” she joked.

He clenched her hair in his hands and tugged gently.

“How do you know that?”

She searched his eyes. “Do you? I mean—do you want to?”

“I do—and so many other things.”

She let out a nervous giggle. “I think you’re feeling the effects of that gasoline you’re drinking, Morgan.”

His gaze dropped to her mouth as his hand crept up her thigh and rested on her hip. She jumped in surprise when he squeezed. “Actually, I don’t believe I’m drunk enough,” he said. “At this point, I know exactly what I’m doing, which means I’d be held responsible for my actions.”

Syd placed her hands on his stomach and felt his taut muscles tighten in response. “Den would kill you. So would Red.”

Morgan traced her lips with his thumb. “It may be worth it. Let me . . .” Then, his mouth was on hers, drawing a low moan from her mouth. The simple touch of his lips to hers set off a fire in Syd that seemed to burn brighter and hotter with every second.

She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck as he continued to assault her senses with his kisses. He slid his tongue across her bottom lip, demanding entrance, which she happily granted. She gripped a fistful of his hair as he pulled her onto his lap. He rocked into her, introducing her to his rock hard erection. She braced her other hand against the window as she grinded into him. He trailed hot, wet kisses down her throat and cupped her breasts in his hands. As his thumbs traced her nipples, she cried out and he captured her cry with his hot mouth.

Reluctantly, she tried to pull away, but he latched onto her bottom lip with his teeth and sucked. He obviously wasn’t ready for this to end . . . neither was she.

 GET YOUR COPY TODAY!!!!!

About the author:

Born and raised in Southeast Michigan near Ann Arbor, Elle learned the importance of reading from her mother. It was also her mother who, later on in her life, gave Elle her first romance novel: Indigo by Beverly Jenkins. From that moment on, Elle became a fan of Ms. Jenkins for life and a lover of all things romance. An old journal she wrote back in college became her first book (which she still wants to publish one day).

Social Media Links:

Website

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Goodreads

My Review:

First off, let me start out by saying the dedication had me in tears. Such heartfelt words by Author Elle Wright to her beloved mother. I felt the emotion she was obviously experiencing, behind each word she used to describe what her mother is to you. I know her mother is very proud!

I received a copy of The Forbidden Man before the release date for promotional blitz purposes during the release week of the book for my blog. I wanted to read the book before my post in order to give my honest opinion to my readers. I started the book and finished it within a day and a half. I couldn't put it down. 

The story and characters are so well-written and developed; I fell in love with them all. Sydney, the main character of this particular book has been through a lot and feels obligated to stay in a relationship with the man she's engaged to be married to because he saved her life. She is finally fed up just weeks before her wedding after receiving a phone call from the woman he has cheated on her with over and over again. Finding comfort in her best friend, Sydney's world is flipped upside down. Putting herself first for once in her life creates family drama, but yet, she takes a chance on "true love". Rethinking her decision, Sydney goes through the motions while bringing her close friends and family along with her, especially Morgan, the man she has fallen passionately in love with. 

If you are an avid reader looking for an amazing romance novel, The Forbidden Man is everything you could ask for: passion, desire, sexiness, love, friendship, loyalty, drama, and happy endings. Elle Wright breathed life into her characters and their journey of the unknown called love. I was seriously jealous of Sydney because Morgan is THE MAN! If you are a fan of Beverly Jenkins, you will simply love Elle Wright. She is playing hardball and has hit a perfect home run with the first installment in the Edge of Scandal Series, The Forbidden Man. I dare you to check it out for yourself. You won't be disappointed; but hooked, highly anticipating the next book. 

I hope you support Elle Wright's new release by purchasing her book and telling a friend. Let's help make her book a best-seller! And once you read it, please leave a review so others will know your thoughts. Reviews are important...

Until next time, Be Inspired, Be Encouraged, & Be YOU!!!

Purple Hugs,

KeKe Chanel