Wednesday, January 25, 2012

"Family Ties and Values”

Have you ever been surrounded by negativity so immensely that it just caused your entire world to shift? The worse part about it is that more often than not, it is the people we call family. Why is that? And nowadays, it’s not even a big surprise. Ask anybody the question “who is more likely to want to see you fail” and nine times out of ten, their answers will be the same “family”. It’s sad that the very people we love and care for are the ones who want to see us struggle, unhappy and unsuccessful. What happened to family having each other’s backs? What happened to family wanting the best for each other? More importantly, what happened to our “family values”? It breaks my heart that this is becoming an epidemic. Isn’t there enough with the way the economy is? The way our healthcare and education is taking a backseat in a country called “the land of the free”. We cannot afford to neglect family too!
Throughout history family was the most important thing in life. Family came first. Family morals and values superseded all things. If a young man wanted to court or marry a young lady, he had to go through her family. If they didn’t like him, neither did her. That is because of the level of love and support she had from them. She respected her parents enough to make wise choices. She thought about life without the love of them and didn’t want to have a life that way. The strong foundation of family gave insight to her judgments and decision making. She even thought about her own children. Who wants to be attached to someone who doesn’t treat them right or their children, if added into the equation? Sadly today, the value of family isn’t looked upon as much. If a young girl likes a young boy and her mother or father doesn’t like or approve of him, it only pushes her further into his arms. If a father doesn’t show his daughters how a man should treat a woman, they always look for such love and attention in the wrong places. Young men who are not taught how to become great, respectful, and Godly men, end up in one of two places.
It takes a family to lead our young men and women down the right path. If our youth cannot get the discipline, love and encouragement from home, when they go out into the cruel world, they will be eaten alive. I hate to say it, but this is why we have so many crowded cemeteries and prisons. We become a product of our environment if we don’t make the decision to change our environment. Don’t just adapt, strive for something better. Know your self-worth, value, and importance in life. Family teaches that, but it is strictly up to us to start it off. Don’t hold grudges, become bitter or too prideful to make peace with your family members. Regardless of how they are, they belong to us.   
It’s time for change! When something amazing happens to us and we want to share such goodness, family should be the first we call. We should be able to laugh, shout and cry together in happiness, not put down, criticize or find fault. Have you ever thought about the fact that we can choose many things in our lives, but family isn’t one of those things? The people in our inner circle are the people God intended for us to love, cherish, uplift, support, and be there for one another. Let’s start today by changing our attitude and regard toward the people we should love no matter what!
So starting now, if you have family around you show and express your love and gratitude for them. It’s as simple as that. If you have a problem, go to them and communicate. Communication is the best way to let someone know what’s on your mind or how you feel. Be kind to one another. Life is hard enough on a day to day basis don’t help it out by adding more stress.
I can truly say that I love all of my family. Now don’t get me wrong, there are a few whom I love from a distance but if and when they need me, even if they don’t, I am always there for them. Some people don’t have families. They may have lost their mothers, fathers and other loved ones due to death, distance or deception, so don’t take yours for granted. Try to make peace with the ones you don’t see eye to eye with. And the ones you see or talk to daily, tell them how much you love and appreciate them. Spend time with them. Build them up with encouragement. Don’t just hug, but embrace them. There is a difference. Anyone can give a hug but an embrace really goes deeper. It warms the heart, touches the soul and renews the spirit.
I pride myself in giving warm embraces. I embrace people the way I want to be embraced. Have you ever had a bad day and then got home to a warm embrace? Didn’t it make all the difference in the world? I’ve given embraces and later learned that I helped someone get through a hard time. I have friends and we embrace each other each time we see one another. They are people I consider family. Although we are not blood related, they are still a part of my family. I can also say that when I wasn’t receiving the love and support from blood, those friends gave me hope, determination and encouragement. Make the choice to do the same for the people around you. Life is so much better when you have people in your corner through good and bad times. Trust me, as long as you continue to live, trials will come. Don’t go through them alone, especially when you don’t have to!
Family is important! Don’t deprive yourself from having a solid relationship with them. If you have children, don’t allow them to see the negative side of family. Even if you are a single mother or father, there are still people in your life who are there for you, for them. Surround yourself with those loved ones so that when they grow up, they will be better human beings. That they will know the importance of family and family values. They will be kind to others, believe in themselves and strive to be better than you. After all, the children are our future. How they led us starts with you! You choose.
Until next time, be inspired, be encouraged, be blessed and be a better you!!
Smooches,
Keke Chanel

Follow me on twitter @keke_chanel

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