Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Let's Talk About Sex (Part 4)

“Swingers”--- Cheating or Not?

So, I was asked to talk a little about this particular topic. I wonder if the group Mint Condition knew when they wrote the lyrics “You send Me Swinging” that there was an entire community of individuals who didn’t take the phrase lightly. Yes, there are many people who welcome such lyrics, forming groups to take their sexual experiences to the next level.  For the month of August, I have been doing a series called “Let’s Talk about Sex” and surprisingly, I have gotten great feedback as well as topics others would like discussed during this series. Swinging was one of them. I didn’t know much about the term, but with the help of the World Wide Web, I am now more educated than I thought possible about this growing community in today’s society.

I guess one would most definitely have to be open-minded is an understatement, right! The more I researched, the more I became impressed. There are clubs nationwide that are classy, upscale and sensual to say the least. There is a membership were fees are paid. There is testing so that everyone knows that whomever they become free and embrace their wild side with isn’t exposed to any non-wanted diseases. There are no pressures into doing anything you don’t want to do. One can simply go there to observe, learn or grow from the experience.  There are monthly calendar events, detailed, to the point and with no hidden agendas. The atmosphere looks inviting, comfortable and creates a welcoming, free-flowing social décor, so that anyone isn’t pressured or expected to take part in anything they are not dedicated 100% to take part in.

Swinging has been around for ages, only more couples nowadays are receptive to branching out and trying new endeavors. Some couples use this experience to spice up their relationships. Some also use swinging as a way to become intimate with other people without feeling like they are cheating. Is this true? Is swinging considered cheating? If both individuals are willing to participate in the act, does it still count as infidelity? My answer is “YES”. Anything outside of marriage or a committed relationship is cheating. Does swinging justify cheating?

I looked up the term “swinging” in the dictionary and there are many definitions but these are the ones that stood out. This is what Webster defines it as: free and uninhibited sexually, exchanging spouses for sex, lively, active and modern, hip. Well damn, I really wasn’t expecting this when I first decided to look up this word. My face is frozen is time, with my mouth hanging slightly open. I am too outdone. Surprised and a little shocked that this is even in our dictionaries. I guess this is something much more practiced and accepted than I initially thought. I guess if SWAG is now added, why not swinging, right. Many words are added to the dictionary each year, but I am still dumbfounded about what the actual definition read.

If one is in a relationship and things are not going as they should, is it called swinging if one of the parties go outside of the relationship? After all, cheating is swinging from one person to the other. Let me is tell you what Webster defines this as. Cheating or cheater: to elude, to violate rules or regulations, to be sexually unfaithful. So with that being said, would one call swinging, cheating? I guess that can be easily debated in an ongoing discussion. It all depends on the individuals participating in the debate. So, if there are any out there with opinions or clarifications, feel free to post your comments. I knew that when asked to write about this particular topic that it would be touchy, but I found it broad and interesting. Everyone is entitled to his/her opinion and we do live in America, where freedom of speech is embraced. So, if there are people like me, who loves voicing or sharing their thoughts and opinions, please do. I don’t really have much more to say regarding this topic. I don’t think that I am as open-minded to go this far. Although I am very open and free to most things, I think that I may have to pass on swinging. As one of my best friends say, “Not my cup of tea”, so with that being said. I will move on to the next topic up for discussion. Stay tuned!

Next up: Part 5---Romance

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