Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Let's Talk About Sex (Part 5) "Romance"


Okay, I must admit that I love old black and white classic love stories. They give me hope that romance still exists and will never die. I love when the man lets the woman go only to suddenly realize that she is the love of his life, which goes anywhere to find her, express his undying love and then they begin their journey together. Yeah, I know. It sounds corny, unrealistic but I am still a believer that romance never dies. Romance is powerful, pivotal even, to any relationship that tends to survive.  Romance is like poetry. It takes you on a ride of emotions, feelings, gratification, intensity, freeing your mind to the endless possibilities of love. If you get a minute watch “Love Story”, you will laugh and cry from the two lovers in the tale. It is really one of the best movies ever made. No lie!!! But it is a real tear-jerker. Have your tissue ready, you will need about a box.

Romance seems to find me when I least expect it. I can be driving along in my car and a song comes on the radio. I smile because it has great meaning and such romantic flare, that I find myself smiling, singing along and unable to get to my guy fast enough. I wouldn’t call myself a “helpless romantic” but I do have a few ideas swirling around in my head that will give them a run for their money. Have you ever just picked up a card from the store for your special someone, just because? Have you ever bought their favorite thing just to see the smile appear on his/her face when they see it? If not, you should start. These are the first and small things to the beginning of your romantically enhanced future. Who doesn’t like to be pampered or spoiled even? Nothing screams romance more than the “little things”. There is nothing more romantic than coming home and dinner is cooked, candles lit, and your favorite glass of wine greets you. Some may call it wishful thinking or think that such thing does not happen, but I can honestly say that it does. I can be feeling sick or just not quite myself and my guy can leave the house and come back with my favorite candy bar or something simple that he knows I love. He can touch me in a certain way that somehow brightens up my day. He can smile and my world is OKAY. If that isn’t romantic then what is? It’s not the size or the gift; it’s simply the thought, the effort, the kind gesture to do something to show your appreciation for the other.

I find watching football, lying on the sofa, eating junk food, romantic. There is nothing more romantic to me than seeing my man interact with the TV screen, rooting for his favorite team or the underdogs with him getting all worked up at a bogus call or score from the opposing team.  Seeing him laugh at me because I get so wrapped up in the game I get a little bit overexcited. Yes, I love, love, love me some football!!! (Two more weeks, BABY!!) What tops that is, getting a quickie during halftime, with promises to have your own overtime later on. Damn, romance can come in many forms. It all depends on the people involved. True, getting all dressed up, going out to a fancy restaurant for dinner and just basking in the company of each other is romantic, but I like being more creative than that. Hey, we can dress up and go eat any day of the week, but me giving a much needed back rub, making some brownies and just spending some quality with our fingers intertwined, some alone time with my guy is way more romantic. I say, use your own special ways to be romantic, bring joy to your special someone. They will in turn go out of their way to return the favor.

Romance is defined as: to court or woo, treat with ardor or chivalrousness, sentiment, emotion or desire. If two people love each other, they tend to want to express it through many things. Romance should be top of such list but whatever works, go for it! This also makes making love ten times more intense, pushing both of your emotions to the next level. Great sex is defined by romance, and romance gives unspoken permission to spice things up, try new things, or simply put it on them in a way that they are left speechless, rubbing their heads, and ready for round two and three. Yes, romance can do all of this and more for your relationship. Can being in the same room, doing completely opposite things, with the person you love, be romantic? Hell yeah! Those, I find are the most romantic moments we share that we can look back on during terrible times in life or relationships. Bad things will happen but I believe that good things outweigh the bad any given day of the week. Life will most definitely throw curve balls, leaving us sometimes broken. We may want to give up, let up and move on but that is when romance steps in and turn those harsh times into life’s lessons, we overcome. I was feeling a bit romantic earlier today and wrote a poem to express my emotions. I will share it with you all. I hope you can receive the romantic underlining I was experiencing as I gave words a voice, bringing them to life. Here goes.


Can you open up my heart
Seal it with a kiss
Promising to never cause it any pain 

Can you whisper into my ear
Sweet words of passion
Consoling the depths of my soul
Leaving me breathless

Can you gaze into my eyes
Until pleasure consumes my inner-ability
To release waves of penetration
Causing overwhelming joy

Can you make love to me
Without touching my body
Providing internal stimulation to my spirit
Leaving me high

Can you give all of yourself to me
And only me
Loving me without regret
Making love to me emotionally
Kissing me in places other than my lips
Expressing your undying desire

Can you let passion push us over the edge
Of reasoning
Bitch-slapping us eternally
Whipping us mindless
Wanting only each other
Until our time here is done and beyond

Can you promise to be mine
My soul mate
My best friend
My all or nothing
Creating in me the perfect ending
To our love story
Thickening the plot along the way

Can you take my heart
Guard it with your own
Never leave it broken or in pain
Simply let nothing tear us apart

Can you let romance conquer us
Capture our souls
Murder our spirits
Constrict our minds

Can you…

So this is how I was feeling and this is what poured out of the depths of my soul. I love poetry. Poetry has given me ways to express my romance. It pulls from deep within and brings forth words you wouldn’t usually speak to the one you love. It doesn’t have to rhyme, make sense to anyone but you and the one intended, becoming more powerful than imagined, hence romance.  Romance to me is like a mother’s love when you are dealing with a horrible experience, wrapping you in her arms, letting you know that you are not alone. (I know that was deep but so is romance) It sometimes catches us off guard, capturing us, leaving us speechless. I put together a romantic playlist, which I will share below. I promise, if you didn’t think you had any romance in you, you will after listening to this playlist. I wish I could just add the songs to my blog but I still don’t know how to do that. I will figure it out, promise! I have created more than one but this is the one I will share today. (Ya’ll gonna have to pay me for the other ones. One of my close friends got a copy of it from me and told me that she almost got pregnant just listening to it on her way to work. Now you know that is so serious shit. And from a playlist that I put together, yeah I need to get compensated, fa real!!) LOL

Have you ever seen a couple holding hands, walking together without a care in the world? I love seeing that. They may have just had a fight or argument but because of the romance soaring through them, they overcome their disagreement, whatever it may be and give in to the intoxicating romantic flare generating from each other. I think having strong romance in any relationship ultimately leads to great sex, mind-blowing love making, indescribable passion and the best pleasure one could imagine. It makes you think, huh! It should.  Even people who haven’t been in serious relationships possess romance. It sometimes takes another romantic person or should I say “the right person” to open them up to the thought of giving all of them to another. I knew a few people like that but romance captures them harder in the end. They are the best lovers, givers and providers. They want nothing in return, which makes the one receiving want to give more.

Even if you have been bitten, done wrong or taken for granted in past relationships, don’t let that cloud your mind, steal your passion or push romance out of your heart. There is someone out there for everyone and sometimes it take a few wrongs to prepare us and get us to our right. Don’t look or dwell on the past. True, life experiences should be shared to help us all get past them, to grow and encourage others, but don’t allow them to make you bitter. Don’t turn into the receiver, giving nothing at all. This is the easiest way to push the person intended to be your heart’s keeper, away for good. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not to world’s romantic person nor do I think I know everything there is about romance, but I am pretty confident in my ability and openness to try. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again!” 

Often times we tend to lose sight of what our relationships really mean to us and someone always feel unappreciated. I know too many stories, saw too many movies, read too many books about this madness and the only thing I can say to fix this problem is to embrace your romantic side. Do something for your mate that you wouldn’t usually do. Leave them a little love note in a place they will look and find it, that will make them smile. Send a sexy text message. Kiss them while they are asleep, waking them up to make love. A simple gesture means more than you know, trust me. They will thank you generously and in more ways than you can even fathom. I dare you to try it and see how much better your relationship becomes. And believe you me, I am not the world’s-best at relationships but I have been in a few, saw others and took notes, pointers from them all. I am a great catch though!

Nothing is life is perfect except love. Romance just helps tie up all the loose ends. So with that being said, treat your mate like your favorite pair of shoes. Don’t walk them through the mud, scratch them up, throw them in a corner, or leave them out for the dog to chew them up. Nurture them, protect them, love them, admire them, and floss them. There is nothing more that looks great on a woman other than a sexy pair of shoes, than a smiling guy, thinking about how lucky he is to have such a beautiful both inside and out, caring and loving woman by his side. His entire day could have been F’ed up but the mere thought of the way his woman shows her appreciation and desire for him will make it completely disappear. Like one of the songs from my playlist “Nothing really matters at all”, find anyone and speak on that topic and see what he/she has to say about the matter. I can guarantee they smile or blush and tells you about the special someone in their life. Romance, my friends, takes the relationship to the next level and beyond if your creative juices are flowing. Let your mind use you to bring forth and play out different scenarios. Share them and help others achieve their romantic expertise, should I say. If romance wasn’t taken so lightly, the world we live in would be a much brighter, happier and amazing place. The stars and the moon would be envious that they only get to be part of it only part of the time. The sun would smile when the wind blow and each day we would have raindrops because rain couldn’t stay away from the glow surrounding the human race, wanting to feel what has everyone divine.

For now, here is the playlist I created. It is called “LOVE LETTERS” For a romantic evening with your special someone, put this on, lit some candles and enjoy where the evening goes. Open your mind and let romance run free!

1 Come Away With Me---Norah Jones
2 Say Yes---Floetry
3 No Ordinary Love---Sade
4 Nothing Even Matters—Lauryn Hill
5 All I ever think about—Chrisette Michelle
6 That’s the Way Love Goes—Janet Jackson
7 Your Love’s Supreme—Chante Moore
8 I Nominate You—Fantasia
9 Motivation—Kelly Rowland
10Giving Myself—Jennifer Hudson
11Pieces of Me—Ledisi
12I Think I love you—Algebra
13Never Gonna Let you go—Faith Evans
15Make Love—Keri Hilson

To listen to this playlist, you can follow me on Ping. My username is Keke Chanel. There you can listen to all the playlist I upload, starting with the one listed above.

Ladies especially, if your guy doesn’t feel special and you haven’t been bitten by the romance bug after allowing the sultry sounds of these women take ahold of you then it’s just not in you. I get worked up just thinking about what the night will bring and just how romantic we both can get. Add a bubble bath and it’s on! If you know what I mean! So, keep it real, keep it ready, and keep it romantic! Enjoy, have fun and live. Life is too short to go through too afraid to open up and allow nature to take its’ course.  Believe it in your heart, in your spirit, in your soul that romance will never DIE, as I do!

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